One thing that I am grateful during this time is that it has really been such a time for growth, both for Ben and I. We certainly have been tried and tested and I feel like I have come away from all of this as a much stronger person. That's not to say that I would like to do it over, but at least I can see that there has been a positive change. One thing that I really have been thinking about the past few days is that this has helped me to get over myself (so to speak). Oh, that's not to say that I won't have plenty of selfish moments still. We are all human and it's so natural for us to be self-absorbed. But what I mean is that this has helped me to really see beyond my own little world into the world of those around me. Yes, this has been a difficult season. Yes, I wish my husband was home and that this sweet child were a part of our family. BUT, it could be worse. It could always be worse. And I am so overjoyed to know that there is hope for a future with no suffering. I long for heaven in a way that I have never longed for it before.
Part of this realization is also a friendship that I have developed over the past few months. Really, I can't chalk this up to anything other than divine intervention. Hunter and I were at the park about a month before Ben deployed and Hunter began playing with a couple other little boys there. The mother of these boys struck up a conversation with me (I had already noticed that she was wearing an adoption shirt) and through the course of that conversation I found out that she was the widow of one of the helicopter pilots that was killed here at Fort Lewis in December of this year. That particular night Ben's Company had been the responders that helped secure the crash site, so although I didn't know what was happening that night, I had been praying for her family from the time that Ben got a call, threw on his uniform and disappeared out the front door. This family had just finalized an adoption of a little boy with some severe medical issues and days later lost their father. Wow. Anyway, the point of telling you this is that she has been such an inspiration to me. It's really hard to feel sorry for yourself over something like my own experience when clearly it is trivial compared to a loss like theirs. Which is not to say that she is in anyway asking for pity. Oh, no! It's quite the opposite. Instead she is choosing to do just what I have been wanting so badly. She is creating beauty out of those ashes and she is using her story to help others. I am so honored to be helping her do this and I would love if you would join us as well. The organization that she is starting is called LiveYourLoveLoud and the mission is basically just to help those who can't help themselves - specifically widows and orphans. We are still working out kinks and trying to figure out how to get a webpage going, etc but for this month the funds raised will go toward putting a roof on a clinic in Bugabo, Africa. If you would be interested in helping do this please check out my friend's blog (and read her story while you are there. She is an AMAZING writer!) Here's the link: Holding Fast
Thank you for all the support you have given us so far. Honestly, it has been just amazing to have so many people behind us. It makes all the difference in the world.
Now, if you'll excuse me I have to tend to a dead truck. I tell ya, if it's not one thing it's another around here! At least the truck had the decency to wait to die until life had become a little calmer. Ha!
Oh, and one more thing! Here's a little "kindergarten cuteness" for you!
Love,
B, E & H
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